My New Pink Button - Bettie
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MNPB Gave My Vagina A New life!
I'd been using MNPB for months and let me tell ya, my sex life was NEVER better!<br /><br />Each night I would slap some of this snatch staining salve on and hit the club. While the rest of my bloated lush body got sweaty and lackluster throwing back drinks and grinding up against a cloud of Axe body sprayed men to the latest MyCy jam, my vajay stayed as pink and fresh (from a distance) as ever. Each night I'd take at least one new guy home with me, and dude, the free drinks did. not. stop. That was the most fun 9-months of my life!<br /><br />Only complaint: I could never tell if I was on my period or not, and turns out I was pregnant the whole time. Bummer. But don't worry betches, this story has a happy ending... little Baby Gaga was delivered in the club's bathroom by a super muscular bouncer (and, yes, my new common law husband) Brad-the-Dad. Can you believe that was already his nickname?!? Kinda perfect....
if the underwear fits!
uhm.can i use this on my ex boyfriend's junk? i figure since he IS a p*#sie,he may as well look like one,too.<br />please reply soon.i am working against the clock and only have a small window of opportunity to help me bc he is<br />passed out drunk.<br />thanks, in advance!
Doesn't your man deserve perfection?
Ladies, we all know that we are nothing unless we can catch a man and keep him. We also know that the fat, balding, underachieving, middle-aged shlub we married will ditch us in a moment for that man-stealing ho Miss Universe if we aren't superficially perfect at all times. But what to do when we start to look like one of those "normal" women instead of an always-perfect supermodel?<br /><br />My New Pink Button is the answer! Formulated by a quack manicurist - sorry, I mean a "paramedical esthetician" - My New Pink Button will take off the years, take off the children, and take off the reality! Its patented "natural" "formula" (wink wink) is guaranteed to remove what other, lesser women call "normal vaginal coloration" and replace it with pink perfection! And all this with a minimum of permanent scarring and complete loss of sexual response - but who needs that anyway, sex is for men!<br /><br />My New Pink Button has never been tested on animals (so if it burns your skin off or causes cancer that's your problem) and contains twenty disposable applicators (so you'll be able to fool him twenty times!).<br /><br />Remember, girls: when your man comes home after a long, hard day of standing around the water cooler telling dirty jokes and ogling the secretaries, he deserves the hottest, most ultra-conformist woman he can find. You owe it to him to be as superficially perfect as you can! Buy My New Pink Button today!
The other lip balm
Best gift idea ever! I got some for all my girlfriends and they raved about it! I did not get to try it myself however, as the dog stole mine and later there was a horrible mess to deal with.<br />Oh, and speaking of horrible messes, be more careful than I was- I got the stocking stuffers mixed up and it caused an acute scene on Christmas morning when little Jackson opened what he thought was lip balm in front of grandma- just before she opened hers.<br />We are celebrating the holidays in a foreign country next year.
Can't stop laughing!!!!!
I would like to give thanks to Count Beefula for an outstanding and inspiring review of this product.
This kitty's got a new coat ... of paint!
I wasn't even aware of my embarrassing genital discoloration before I stumbled across this product. I haven't been this "fresh" and (temporarily) pink for 25 years! (I'm 32, you do the math ...).<br />My boyfriend hasn't noticed the difference yet (he prefers to do it with the lights off, eyes closed), but one of these days I'm going to "accidentally" show him my sexy new vagina and prepare to get skewered!<br />Just think ... if it weren't for your product, many women might not even consider the color of their labia to be a problem at all. Can you imagine? Women walking around with gray, discolored vaginas in their pants and feeling totally OKAY about it? Gross!
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